Cooking and cigars have a lot in common,” proclaims Rocco DiSpirito. “Both involve fire, friends and the celebration of something handmade. It’s all about pleasure and satisfaction.” And the one-time NBC reality-series chef and cookbook king indeed believes in the pursuit of happiness — whether it’s fine food, libation or cigars.

On this particular night we’re hitting a few holiday parties in his hometown of Manhattan. First stop is a Johnnie Walker Blue re-launch celebration in a makeshift space overlooking Central Park. Hanging with him Entourage style gets us ushered to a roped-off VIP area by giddy young publicists who flirt with him endlessly. Me? I’m Turtle. I just brought the cigars. DiSpirito, who began his career in some of the greatest restaurants in the city, including Lespinasse and Union Pacific, confesses his first cigar was a wild cherry–flavored Tijuana Smalls in the fourth grade. “My friend and I thought they made us look cool.”

His introduction to slightly better smokes came while dating an English woman. Brought to London to meet the parents, her father tutored DiSpirito in finer cigars, including long and skinny Cohibas...

“Lanceros?” I ask.

He smiles, “Yes, that’s what they were called.”

The relationship with cigars long outlasted the lady. But even with a Siglo VI in his hand, DiSpirito says he was never among the masses that only want Cohibas — or even just Cubans, for that matter. This is a man who makes his living from tasting the world’s variety, and he’s just as happy with Nicaraguan or Honduran sticks. His personal humidor is filled, mostly, with Padrón 1926 Maduro Anniversario No. 9.

But when the topic of a great cigar dinner is brought up, he admits nothing beats a great red-blooded all-American steak. But the preparation doesn’t have to be red, white and blue. “Italians don’t barbeque. They use small wire baskets and cut the meat into smaller strips and lay the basket directly on the fire. It’s called alla bracce, meaning cook on the coals. Italians often use the living room fireplace.” And it’s not only about steak; lamb chops are perfect too. “Eaten by hand, scottaditto which means burns the fingers,” he says.

As for cigars > During a cigar dinner, DiSpirito is clear — smokes are not on the menu. “There are only so many stimulations your nose, mouth and eyes can handle,” he says. “You wouldn’t eat dessert all through the meal.” Torching up is for afterwards. After a trendy eatery in lower Manhattan’s Meatpacking district (and a few other stops) we end up at — of all places — his mom’s house. “Let’s just pop in and say ‘hi.’ She loves it when I drop by with friends,” the good son admits.

She is the legendary Nicolina DiSpirito, who rolled into America’s heart on a platter of world-famous meatballs in the 2003 reality series The Restaurant. But Rocco himself came off a bit aloof — and despite strong first-season ratings, the second season didn’t fare as well. It taught him a lot about humility and knowing his limitations.

Now he’s back > These days, the 41-year-old bachelor is developing a new show for A&E, and has a new cookbook, Rocco’s Real Life Recipes. While his birthday isn’t for a week, his mom brings out a cake, a card… and then proceeds to show me the family photos. By the end of the night I’ve met two generations of culinary hospitality, and their warmth is contagious.

DiSpirito especially seems to like the people he meets over cigars. He time-travels for a moment back to 2001. “I was at Union Pacific, and in walks Avo Uvezian, founder of AVO cigars.” With his straw fedora, the silver-haired gentleman in the white suit cast a spell over the chef. “It was like meeting Frank Sinatra,” DiSpirito says. “He gave me a box of specially blended cigars from the year 2000. And before he left he slipped me a few unbanded Churchills. It was amazing.”

Rocco’s Ideal Cigar Menu

- Fatty tuna belly with lemon and caviar sprinkled on top
- Tartine of black truffles
- Wild mushroom or saffron risotto
- Prime, rib eye steak aged 21 days (“Nothing organic; good ol’ USA Prime beef.”)
- Mashed potatoes with lots of butter
- Creamed spinach (“Like the Palm does it.”)
- A case of California Cabernet from Robert Craig or the Bryant Family (“Any vintage, you can’t go wrong.”)

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